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your moment of zen
Well, so far the Lenten fast is going well. I kept the laptop closed during all three classes today. I also drew a Sierpinski gasket with a fractal dimension of seven, and calculated Pascal's Triangle to the eleventh level in base 36, and read two more chapters of "A History of Playing Cards."
I am *fascinated* by the dribble that book is letting out about the midieval cartier's trade. Apparently the making of playing cards was a major industry in some Rennaissance cities, enough that there were cartier's guilds and lots of disputes about imports and exports - which makes sense, because playing cards must have been one of the first cheaply mass-produced luxury items - in many countries, the making of playing cards was the first economically important use of printing techonology. And apparently women were very important workers in the trade, from the beginning. I desperately want an excuse to learn more about this, and possibly write a story on it.
In other news, I want to talk about Boston Legal some more. I know very few (if any) of the people on my flist who like slashy TV are watching Boston Legal. I just want to know *why* they aren't.
This is the fandom that my sister pimped me into by telling me "Captain Kirk and Daniel Jackson are sleeping together. *Canonically*." (Which was true.) If you're watching House or Smallville or SGA and saying "My god, are they really that gay?" - no, they aren't. Denny Crane and Alan Shore are. There's the sleeping together, and the slow dancing, and the suggestive cigar smoking, and the *constant* heavy flirting, and the pre-wedding jitters, and the frequent promises that they'll be there for each other no matter what, and no girlfriend will interfere, and the longing gazes - and that's just in the half-dozen episodes I've actually seen. I'll bet a sawbuck that it's even gayer than The Sentinel.
So, anyway, here's the BL gay marriage story that I fear I am never going to see, unless the fandom grows exponentially (as it really should):
Alan Shore picks up a case involving Massachussetts gay marriage. Actually involving two zaftig blondes who married each other. But they're in some sort of legal trouble - legal trouble which possibly pre-dates the marriage - and one of them is trying to claim spousal privilege to avoid testifying. The lawyers on the other side are trying to make a case that spousal privilege should not apply due to the circumstances of the marriage (with heavy undertones that it's not a *real* marriage anyway) and claim that they got married solely to avoid the testimony - with a large part of their case resting on the fact that neither of them showed any homosexual tendencies before the wedding, and they had been best friends for years without any evidence that they were romantically involved, and therefore the marriage is clearly under false pretenses and null.
You can see where this is going. Alan has to craft a rousing defense of true love and best friends finding it in each other. Alan, of course, is desperately and quietly in love with his best friend Denny Crane, and has been for ages, and counts on Denny's general obliviousness and deep capacity for denial to keep him from seeing the massive hints that Alan is constantly dropping. The case isn't going very well. Alan talks Denny into helping out: Denny, being a screwball conservative, is rather doubtful at first, but Alan lures him into it with the promise of hot blonde-on-blonde action.
Denny merely manages to turn what had been a small dispute into a media circus that may turn out to be a test case for gay marriage and civil unions around the country. The case still isn't going well for them. Alan leans over his desk and says, "I suppose *we* could get married. It would prove that we believe our own arguments, at least."
"Yes, but Alan," says Denny, "I *don't* believe our arguments."
Alan gets that expression on his face which he gets about six times every episode, which says, 'I know you don't mean to hurt me like that, because it's not your fault you don't realize that you're in love with me too, but it doesn't make it hurt any less,' and says "You could at least try."
So it's the last day of the case, and Denny is giving a rousing, dramatic closing argument all about the power of love and finding your soul mate in the last place you ever expected, and at the climactic moment, he strides over and pulls Alan into a clinch.
About five minutes later he comes up for air, breathing hard and with his pupils dilated black, and says, "The Defense rests," and yanks Alan off to the elevator to ravish him.
The case is declared a mistrial, of course, and Paul, on the verge of quitting again, is furious and forbids either of them from coming near the case again. Denny doesn't notice, because he has finally, belatedly discovered the joys of manly love, and that is occupying *all* of his limited attention span. Alan's busy picking out bridesmaid dresses. Shirley's actually rather delighted (although she refuses to show it) because keeping Denny out of trouble will now *officially* be Alan's responsibility, and not hers ... all the junior partners are slightly skeeved, except for Denise, who thinks it's hot.
It would be titled "It's Legal in Boston!". Or something like that. *g* The thing is? This could be an episode of the show! Seriously! It's all one-hundred-percent in character, and fits with the tone of an average episode, and they've done storylines nearly this controversial before. The only reason I can think of that they *wouldn't* do it is if they think that resolving the sexual tension between the romantic leads would be a bad thing, which after my XF experiences I can sympathize with. On the other hand, apparently there are rampant rumors that Denny Crane is going to get a boyfriend later this season, which breaks my brain. If that's true it had better be Alan. Or lead into Alan/Denny. Would this be the first m/m slash 'ship to go canon? (Not counting Spike/Angel, which was too coy to count as true canon in my book. q:)
I am *fascinated* by the dribble that book is letting out about the midieval cartier's trade. Apparently the making of playing cards was a major industry in some Rennaissance cities, enough that there were cartier's guilds and lots of disputes about imports and exports - which makes sense, because playing cards must have been one of the first cheaply mass-produced luxury items - in many countries, the making of playing cards was the first economically important use of printing techonology. And apparently women were very important workers in the trade, from the beginning. I desperately want an excuse to learn more about this, and possibly write a story on it.
In other news, I want to talk about Boston Legal some more. I know very few (if any) of the people on my flist who like slashy TV are watching Boston Legal. I just want to know *why* they aren't.
This is the fandom that my sister pimped me into by telling me "Captain Kirk and Daniel Jackson are sleeping together. *Canonically*." (Which was true.) If you're watching House or Smallville or SGA and saying "My god, are they really that gay?" - no, they aren't. Denny Crane and Alan Shore are. There's the sleeping together, and the slow dancing, and the suggestive cigar smoking, and the *constant* heavy flirting, and the pre-wedding jitters, and the frequent promises that they'll be there for each other no matter what, and no girlfriend will interfere, and the longing gazes - and that's just in the half-dozen episodes I've actually seen. I'll bet a sawbuck that it's even gayer than The Sentinel.
So, anyway, here's the BL gay marriage story that I fear I am never going to see, unless the fandom grows exponentially (as it really should):
Alan Shore picks up a case involving Massachussetts gay marriage. Actually involving two zaftig blondes who married each other. But they're in some sort of legal trouble - legal trouble which possibly pre-dates the marriage - and one of them is trying to claim spousal privilege to avoid testifying. The lawyers on the other side are trying to make a case that spousal privilege should not apply due to the circumstances of the marriage (with heavy undertones that it's not a *real* marriage anyway) and claim that they got married solely to avoid the testimony - with a large part of their case resting on the fact that neither of them showed any homosexual tendencies before the wedding, and they had been best friends for years without any evidence that they were romantically involved, and therefore the marriage is clearly under false pretenses and null.
You can see where this is going. Alan has to craft a rousing defense of true love and best friends finding it in each other. Alan, of course, is desperately and quietly in love with his best friend Denny Crane, and has been for ages, and counts on Denny's general obliviousness and deep capacity for denial to keep him from seeing the massive hints that Alan is constantly dropping. The case isn't going very well. Alan talks Denny into helping out: Denny, being a screwball conservative, is rather doubtful at first, but Alan lures him into it with the promise of hot blonde-on-blonde action.
Denny merely manages to turn what had been a small dispute into a media circus that may turn out to be a test case for gay marriage and civil unions around the country. The case still isn't going well for them. Alan leans over his desk and says, "I suppose *we* could get married. It would prove that we believe our own arguments, at least."
"Yes, but Alan," says Denny, "I *don't* believe our arguments."
Alan gets that expression on his face which he gets about six times every episode, which says, 'I know you don't mean to hurt me like that, because it's not your fault you don't realize that you're in love with me too, but it doesn't make it hurt any less,' and says "You could at least try."
So it's the last day of the case, and Denny is giving a rousing, dramatic closing argument all about the power of love and finding your soul mate in the last place you ever expected, and at the climactic moment, he strides over and pulls Alan into a clinch.
About five minutes later he comes up for air, breathing hard and with his pupils dilated black, and says, "The Defense rests," and yanks Alan off to the elevator to ravish him.
The case is declared a mistrial, of course, and Paul, on the verge of quitting again, is furious and forbids either of them from coming near the case again. Denny doesn't notice, because he has finally, belatedly discovered the joys of manly love, and that is occupying *all* of his limited attention span. Alan's busy picking out bridesmaid dresses. Shirley's actually rather delighted (although she refuses to show it) because keeping Denny out of trouble will now *officially* be Alan's responsibility, and not hers ... all the junior partners are slightly skeeved, except for Denise, who thinks it's hot.
It would be titled "It's Legal in Boston!". Or something like that. *g* The thing is? This could be an episode of the show! Seriously! It's all one-hundred-percent in character, and fits with the tone of an average episode, and they've done storylines nearly this controversial before. The only reason I can think of that they *wouldn't* do it is if they think that resolving the sexual tension between the romantic leads would be a bad thing, which after my XF experiences I can sympathize with. On the other hand, apparently there are rampant rumors that Denny Crane is going to get a boyfriend later this season, which breaks my brain. If that's true it had better be Alan. Or lead into Alan/Denny. Would this be the first m/m slash 'ship to go canon? (Not counting Spike/Angel, which was too coy to count as true canon in my book. q:)
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Do you have any other sources for that rumor? For some reason, to me, "Denny Crane will get a boyfriend" implies not Alan, but "Denny Crane will turn gay" implies Alan. Possibly because the second version specifically fails to mention any party other than Denny, so it could be that all that sleeping together makes him crush on Alan, and he tries to blame it on Mad Cow. Hmm!
Either way it's going to break *Denny*'s brain, which will be gleeful to watch.
So! Why aren't more people watching this show? Hmm?
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Maybe I'll go post a link to my bl fic to the fan community and see what the reaction is.
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Season 1 should be coming out in May, I think! Maybe things'll pick up then?
Is there more of a fandom for The Practice, do you know? Hmm.
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Anyway, I think I'll go watch the Colbert Report instead of doing reading for class, since after all I am on "winter break".
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Also, the show's fannish abreviation is also a term used to indicate guy-on-guy manga (BL="boy love").
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And, yes. Crack.