melannen | The Magical One-Question Hogwarts Sorting Quiz

The Magical One-Question Hogwarts Sorting Quiz

Someone at my work put up a House Points display for a Harry Potter program, so of course we are all talking about what Hogwarts House we are. And I am getting increasingly annoyed at how badly designed so many of the online sorting quizzes are. So here is the simplest and most accurate sorting quiz of all:

Imagine you are eleven years old. You are sitting at the front of the Hogwarts Great Hall. All your new classmates are staring at you. Somebody puts a battered old hat on your head that will make a decision that will change the course of the rest of your life.

Poll #20657 The Magical One-Question Sorting Quiz

Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 125

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What is going through your head?

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I'm pretty sure I know what house I'll be in, and I'm looking forward to it!
55 (44.0%)

I'm afraid I know what house I'll be in, but I hope I'm wrong.
9 (7.2%)

I have no idea what house I'll be in, but I'm excited to find out!
33 (26.4%)

I have no idea what house I'll be in, but I just hope I fit in there.
28 (22.4%)

If you chose the first option, you are now Slytherin!
Slytherins tend to be very certain of their place in the world, a strong sense of their own rights and privileges, and to have a deep respect for authority and tradition (at least in the abstract.) Slytherin has by far the highest proportion of "legacy" students whose ancestors have always been Slytherin, and by far the lowest proportion of first-generation students (who are unlikely to have that much confidence in the sorting system.) Students are usually about evenly split between those who expected Slytherin and those who expected one of the other three houses.

If you chose the second option, you are now Gryffindor!
Gryffindors have strong opinions about things, are not easily swayed by the opinions of others, and are willing to speak up for what they believe. They do not give respect unless it has been earned. Gryffindor tends to have an even mix of students from families with long histories (who are conflicted about tradition and expectation) and first-generation students (who came in with a very basic knowledge of the Sorting system but still thinking they understood it.) Gryffindors are also about evenly split between students who expected Gryffindor and students who expected one of the other houses.

If you chose the third option, you are now Ravenclaw!
Ravenclaws approach the world with curiosity, skepticism, and an open mind, and are the most likely to change their opinions based on new information, or refuse to give an opinion with limited information. Their opinion of authority is "trust, but verify." Ravenclaw has the second-highest proportion of legacy students, and also ends up with a lot of younger siblings who have fewer family responsibilites. Ravenclaw also has the largest number of students whose parents went to other wizarding schools.

If you chose the fourth option, you are now Hufflepuff!
Hufflepuffs tend to have the least secure sense of their place in the world; they value community, friendship, and cultural influence, and have a keen sense of their social status. They are most likely to approach problems based on pragmatic concerns rather than ideals or principles. Hufflepuff is the house of strivers, who feel strong pressure to succeed and improve. Hufflepuff has the highest proportion of Muggleborns, but also the highest proportion of millionaires and Ministers.

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I disagree with your quiz, and would be happy to expand on that if you're interested!

I mean, that's usually the first response of Slytherins who did not expect to be Slytherins.

Arguing about Sorting is the main purpose of Sorting, so you are welcome to expand, as long as we establish going in that I'm still right based on canon. :P

Well, first off, keep an eye on your stats. If you still have 50% or more of your respondents sorted into Slytherin once you have a suitably large sample size, then you'll know your calibration isn't Hogwarts-standard, because if it were you wouldn't be getting more than 25%. (Unless you have reason to believe that your journal is disproportionately read by Slytherins.)

But what I was going to say before: I do admit it's hard to put myself all the way back to the mentality of an 11 year-old, to remember the person I was before going through the brutal and un-magical sorting of adolescence. But I'm pretty sure that whatever sense I had of myself as potentially different from others, it was as "the smart one" or "the bookish one". And I was happy with that distinction, and looked forward to continuing to become even more that person -- because at that point, no one had ever tried to tell me that was a bad thing yet.

So I picture myself with the hat popped on my head, and I picture myself thinking, "The only thing I know about myself that makes me different from other kids is that I'm smart and I like to read... and there's a House exactly for that... and that sounds awesome!" Hence I choose A.

It worked for me!

I'd swap your last two options.

Hufflepuffs would be keen to join with their house, whatever house it was, and would be eager to find out about it so that they could start being part of it. Ravenclaws would, I think, be much more concerned about being "good enough" for it, and anxious in case everyone else turned out to be better at doing it than they were.

I doubt I'll be getting the right stats, mostly because my testing cohort isn't 11-year-olds (andalso my cohort is mostly people who have been taking sorting quizzes since they were teenagers and already have a strong opinion of what house they are in) (and because they aren't actually facing high stakes, just trying to imagine they are.) But yeah, I think (especially based on the criteria I'm using) how old you are will change what house you'd sort into - people in their late twenties/early thirties are much more likely to have a strong sense of self and their place in the world than preteens.

But those are all problems with most sorting quizzes; anything that doesn't account for the very specific circumstances in which the actual Sorting happens may make a perfectly fine personality quiz, but it's not going to come up with the same results the canon Sorting would.

But I have to say - your argument there is, from my POV, just adding to the argument that my quiz sorted you correctly? You're imagining that you're going to the Hat thinking almost entirely about what makes you special, and assuming that all of the infrustructure of the school is going to be aimed at helping you be even more special.

That's not necessarily bad! But if you look at canon, that assured sense of your own specialness as what's most important and most secure is something you have in common with Slytherin kids. I suspect a lot of kids who would have identified strongly as Gifted in the Muggle schools would have ended up in Slytherin.

(Which doesn't mean all smart kids ended up there - I was in Gifted programs and knew I was smart, but I would never have thought that was the only, or the main, thing that made me different, or that what made me different was the most important thing about me.)

Hahaha, I picked the first one because I've never had the slightest doubt that I'm so Ravenclaw it hurts and hanging out with Ravenclaws all day sounds great ... and got the one House I'm fairly positive I don't fit AT ALL. XD Is self-confidence and self-knowledge really that much of a Slytherin trait? idk.

(I fully expect a higher-than-average proportion of self-described Ravenclaws arguing about being sorted into the wrong house in the comments, as per form.)

What's your argument for that?

Those two houses are tricky from a canon-evidence-only POV, because we see so little of them in canon (and especially so little of them in their first couple of years.) So pretty much any theory of them is going to be heavily based on fanon or peripheral canon.

But there seems to be a wide, and long-standing, perception of Ravenclaws as people who want to be "good enough" and want to be "the best" and I just don't see much evidence for it in canon - the very smart people we see in canon who are super invested in being the best all seem to be either Gryffindors or Slytherins (Probably many of them people who either assumed they would be Ravenclaws or were afraid they wouldn't be Ravenclaws). The Ravenclaw we know best is Luna, and it's really hard for me to imagine her being super anxious about her class ranking or anything like that; she is possibly the most laid-back major character of them all. I'm sure there are Ravenclaws who are really invested in being The Best, but the feeling from canon in general is more that Ravenclaws are more likely the ones who spend two months doing all the research and then never bother to turn in the paper because the research was the important part.

Similarly, we don't see much in the way of Hufflepuffs close-up, but what we do see is a lot of Ministry families, and in particular the MacMillans seem to be the standard of a Hufflepuff family: lots of (internal or external) pressure to do well and to be your best self and to fullfill your full potential, whatever that may be. I bet a lot of Triwizard Champions have been Hufflepuffs.

I think there's also a thing going on, though, where the culture of the House tends to mitigate those tendencies - Ravenclaw has a house culture of wanting to be the smartest, so most Ravenclaws get a little more ambitious as a result; Hufflepuffs have a house culture of being really supportive of each other and helping each other deal with that sense of pressure, so a lot of them get more relaxed. But that's not what I really see as the natural tendencies.

And of course all of this is based on 11-year-olds and a snap judgement under stress, so once you get to seventh years people have grown up into all kinds of people.

I must admit, I'm not basing this on textual evidence, so much as my family!

There are several people in my family who are CLEARLY Hufflepuffs, and several who are CLEARLY Ravenclaws, and we all agree on which are which. And all our Hufflepuffs approach group activities on the assumption they'll be welcomed, while all our Ravenclaws tend to be very concerned about proving their ability so that they can be good enough for the group.

But, as far as the actual book characters go, I have to admit, I have no idea. :)

I mean, the thing about all this Ravenclaw self-sorting is that we know the two people in Harry's year with the best marks (and the most emotional investment in their marks!) are a Slytherin and a Gryffindor! And so many people go "smart = Ravenclaw" and leave it there when canon directly contradicts that.

But also I think for me the thing about the Slytherins is they have a certainty that they know where they belong *and* a certainty that The Powers That Be will help them get there. So I think a lot of people are ending up in Slytherin in this quiz because... idk, because they trust me to write an accurate quiz when maybe they shouldn't? :P And there's that small-c conservative trust in authority figures and tradition that's also very Slytherin to me.

You are right that a fundamental aspect of a Ravenclaw is being ready to argue about where they were Sorted, so I'm confused as to why all these Ravenclaws are picking the option which requires them to trust that the quiz will sort them correctly!

For me, I always figured I was a Ravenclaw because all the other houses seemed to require virtues I really don't have, so I was like "yep, probably Ravenclaw, but it would be just as cool to be one of the others, and also who knows what the Sorting Hat is actually looking at, really." But also I was a teacher's kid so I never had any trust that the people in charge of a school had any damn clue what they were doing, so even if I was 100% sure I was a Ravenclaw by personality, even at age 11 I wouldn't have had any confidence at all that the Sorting was more accurate than chance.

But I do think there's people getting sorted into Slytherin here who wouldn't have been that sure of themselves when they were 11, or wouldn't've had that much trust in the Hat if it were for real.

Edited 2018-11-01 04:08 (UTC)

Yeah, there's a lot of people (and quizzes) who sort based on really simple personality traits from the songs - even though we know the songs contradict each other and can't be relied on - and then have a very firm idea of their correct sort.

But also I don't think that what you're saying is completely wrong, especially for older people. Hufflepuffs are people who place a lot of importance on being welcomed into groups, so it's a skill they work on, and get confident about. (Hufflepuffs are politicians!) But because it's a skill they value, it's one that's likely to be at the front of their thoughts in a high-stress situation like the Sorting.

Whereas Ravenclaws usually don't put any skill points into social stuff, so if you throw them into a situation where they have reason to care about being accepted, they don't have any confidence that they know what they're doing, and Ravenclaws aren't good at not knowing, so they often try too hard to prove themselves. But put them in a situation of actual peril, and "will these strangers like me?" is not their first thought.

(Although depending on how you read canon, it's also possible that a lot of Ravenclaws are people who should have been Slytherin except for the blood purity rules; my quiz should probably have a second question where if you sorted into Slytherin but you're muggle-born, you get shunted to your second-best house instead. Which would probably fix nearly all the people who think they're mis-sorted. But that I choose not to acknowledge that particular bit of canon.)

especially for older people. Hufflepuffs are people who place a lot of importance on being welcomed into groups, so it's a skill they work on, and get confident about. (Hufflepuffs are politicians!) But because it's a skill they value, it's one that's likely to be at the front of their thoughts in a high-stress situation like the Sorting.

Whereas Ravenclaws usually don't put any skill points into social stuff, so if you throw them into a situation where they have reason to care about being accepted, they don't have any confidence that they know what they're doing, and Ravenclaws aren't good at not knowing, so they often try too hard to prove themselves. But put them in a situation of actual peril, and "will these strangers like me?" is not their first thought.

Hmm, good point. Okay. You've successfully convinced me. *applauds*

(This Ravenclaw concedes the debate.)

Not even surprised to be a Hufflepuff!

.....yeah, no.

At 11 the most important thing in the world to me was knowing new things. It still is. It's also what I did and do with most of my life. I'm not particularly cunning, and don't particularly value it, and didn't then; I'm not particularly ambitious, and don't particularly value ambition, and didn't then.

The idea that knowing = thinking about what makes you special = Slytherin is . . . silly? It presumes a self-centred/assessment-of-self-in-a-value-system way of approaching the entire question? Which might be accurate for you but is definitely a huge assumption when it comes to other people.

11-y-o me would know she'd be in Ravenclaw because the categories are Known Quantities:

- Gryffindor: brave/chivalrous/etc.
- Hufflepuff: hardworking/etc
- Slytherin: ambitious/cunning/etc.
- Ravenclaw: knowledge/intellect/etc.

And yes, those are arguably simplistic, but those are also clearly the simplistic ideas that the community has about them, which would thus be what would be fuelling my 11 year old assessment. All the moreso if I were Muggleborn because then I've LITERALLY only heard the explanations of other 11 year olds AND the Hat's Song (which I actually do not find contradictory, tbh: not always the same, but I don't really find any of the quality's listed to ever contradict each other, within the same house).

It's a categorization puzzle: here are your four categories, place relevant objects in categories. The relevant object is me. At 11 I was well aware that I wasn't particularly brave (in fact KNEW I wasn't brave, as I hated scary movies, HATED scary situations, LOATHED scary rides and in fact just about anything that involved "brave" was "no"); I was well aware I HAAAAAATED hard work; was well aware I was not ambitious and I didn't really care about being "the best"*; but I LOVED READING and LOVED LEARNING and LOVED KNOWING NEW THINGS and LOVED FINDING THINGS OUT and WANTED TO KNOW EVERYTHING.

Four categories: which one does this child go in? 11 year old me knows how to do these puzzles! They're some of her FAVOURITES at school! She even likes the ones where they're SURPRISE categories that require Extra Thinking!

(*I needed to be a certain level of Good Enough, but this was an external thing: if I wasn't Good Enough then I was a waste of space who deserved death. Because 11 year old me already had a LOT of the thinking patterns that would solidify into adult severe depression. Once past the level of justifying my right to exist and not be garbage, I wasn't particularly concerned about where I was on the hierarchy otherwise.)

Edited (I forgot my footnote. ) 2018-11-01 04:26 (UTC)

Nah, I really don't think I'm a Slytherin.

But you weren't asking us to trust the quiz: you were asking us to trust the HAT.

If you'd asked us to trust the quiz my answer would have been different; but you were positing our belief or lack thereof in reference to the Hat, which is established in canon to be a quasi-sapient hyper-telepathic spell that can rummage around in our heads and base its decision on a significant amount of data.

On the other hand I should note that I was preeeeetty sure your quiz was going to be wrong because literally none of those actually seem to have anything to do with actually being a knowledge-and-learning obsessed child (or adult)? Soooo. *g*

Edited 2018-11-01 04:15 (UTC)

At 11, I wouldn't have trusted teachers, but I would have trusted the Sorting Hat. To me that would not be an authority figure, it would be a magical object that could see into my heart and perceive truths about me that no one else did.

But put them in a situation of actual peril, and "will these strangers like me?" is not their first thought.

.....that.....assumes a lot about the life the proto-Ravenclaw has lead up to that point.

Also your quiz gives no reference to the people in the house? 11 year old me would by no means have made the leap from "which House am I going to be in" (that is, which intellectual-emotional construct will I be affiliated in and labelled with, which category am I going to be sorted in) to "will the other people who are also in this category be my friends."

She would have assumed that, like all other places, the other humans would hate her and probably be out to get her and couldn't be trusted further than they could be thrown. But that'd be true no matter where she went. Because other humans were always dangerous, prone to hate her, and couldn't be trusted further than they could be thrown, and should be watched carefully and warily until it became clear what KIND of assholes they were going to be.

This.

Also, for that matter: at 11 I was already known (and intensely disliked by one teacher) for being the kid who got Very Upset when the answer key was wrong and would argue with it at length (and, which is why the one teacher hated me, was usually right). Because especially if the ANSWER key was wrong then it would MISLEAD the whole CLASS? And then the WHOLE CLASS would believe something that was FACTUALLY UNTRUE and that would be worse than the Apocalypse.

So while I would have been quite sure which category the magical object that could rummage around in my actual mind would put me in (it's a simple category problem!), I also would have been quite happy to explain to it why it was wrong and not actually engaging with the facts and details of the question at hand. At length. With reference to the song it had just sung, which I'd probably memorized.

Because incorrect information/answers about important things when there is significant and substantial evidence and ability to demonstrate what the correct answer is are a Deformity of the Universe and made 11 year old me very. upset.

~~If I'm honest they still make 30-something-year-old-me very upset I'm just usually better at dealing with it.~~

Just how many 11-year-olds did you test this on, to make you so confident that you're right and everyone else is wrong?

WHY AM I ALWAYS SLYTHERIN WHEN I AM CLEARLY RAVENCLAW

I'm so Ravenclaw it hurts and hanging out with Ravenclaws all day sounds great ... and got the one House I'm fairly positive I don't fit AT ALL

OMG, exactly //cries

Ha, my response would actually be "I'm pretty sure I know what house I'll be in, and I'm looking forward to... refusing to participate in the House system, and arguing vehemently that it is unjustifiable, based on extremely sloppy thinking about What People Are Like, and abusive to children!"

And yes, that would be me at eleven. Me at eleven would be STRIDENT and ANGRY about the whole thing and ready to march up to Dumbledore and challenge him to the philosophy-of-education equivalent of pistols at dawn. (Me now basically agrees with me-at-eleven's arguments, but is much less likely to spend energy on trying to reform a system that's unlikely to give a shit about what I have to say.)

I am a Ravenclaw by... basically every standard I have ever seen spelled out, which is why I was certain about what House I'd be sorted into. Also, at eleven, I was clearly and overpoweringly socially identified as a smart bookish philosophical (extremely opinionated and mouthy) kid, so I would have expected Hogwarts to identify me likewise.

So, Ravenclaw. But I would be a conscientious objector Ravenclaw. :D

we are all ~~morbane~~ slytherin, apparently

*cackling so hard at this image*

Sadly I did not yet have the social-theory background at 11 to have reached the same conclusion (I was fixated on OTHER areas), but I admire 11 year old you's conviction.

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