I think a lot of people on DW just TW for rape at all opportunities, which I should probably be better about, tbh. And it's useful in this kind of thread even if I don't need it because other people who are reading will. But I fear that kind of thing in mainstream SF is still kind of background radiation for me at this point. :/

There is also a difference for me, I think, between "needs a warning for rape" and "is rape-y"? But I think not everyone uses them that way. Something could have rape in it as a relevant well-done plot point (or even as self-aware idporn) and need the warning without me thinking of it as rapey; whereas something could have no sexual contact at all but have a general looming atmosphere of, well, rapiness, and count as rape-y for me. (Like, it's questionable whether the scene in Grimspace involved any actual non-con, but it was very definitely rape-y. It partook of the general characteristics of rape.)