kink_bingo is running, for the second year in a row, an April mini-challenge based around themed gift baskets. Of kink.

I was kind of surprised to find that in two years, they hadn't done the obvious and made an Easter basket! So I asked if they'd avoided that on purpose because religion, and the mods replied, no, they just honestly hadn't thought of the possibility as they don't celebrate Easter, and I was welcome to do one if I wanted.

....this is one of the cases where my cultural blinkers become readily apparent and I am suddenly smacked in the face by the fact there are lots of people in this world, even who grew up in a culture superficially like mine, who don't realize that the Passion story is made of kink. Basically, all the cultural influence that would later become Christianity looked into its id and pulled out all the most powerful bits, and then 2000 years of repressed clergy and sacrilegious laity embellished it into something with twisted unplumbable depths, and as a result millions and millions of people over history have first discovered that they really liked thinking about certain things while being encouraged to adore an image of a naked man with fresh whip-marks and piercings and dripping blood and an expression of exalted serenity.

Lalala.

None of the above is me having a dirty mind, by the way, that's just Christianity.

The below is me having a dirty mind. Because I set out to make an Easter themed mini-bingo card and realized I couldn't do just one because I'd have to leave too much out. So here is the Passion story in five kink bingo minicards, complete with Biblical references. (The references are heavy on Matthew and John because that's where most of the kinkiest wording is, and also because I'm too lazy to properly cross-reference. Also I was trying not to repeat any kinks, so sometimes I ended up using one that wasn't quite the ideal - several of them recur over and over in the story.)

(Um, do I need to still warn that this isn't a very nice story, and a lot of the kink in it is very not safe or consensual? Although a surprising amount of it is.)

( The lead-up to the Crucifixion )

( In the Garden of Gethsemane )

( The Trial )

( The Crucifixion )

( The Resurrection )

...and finally, because I admit that was kind of overkill, here's the Best of the Passion Kink Basket:

	BI	N	GO
	Suspension	Whipping/Flogging	Bloodplay
	Humiliation	Obedience	Begging
	Painplay	Piercings/Needleplay	Penance/Punishment

This does, of course, use the kink_bingo + fandom definition of kink which doesn't necessarily involve active sexuality, it just involves things that grip on a level below conscious control, viscerally, cathartically. Serious discussion of the theology involved strongly encouraged. ^_^